Amma

Yesterday morning I went to talk to Swami about quitting the bookstore--I went to talk to Swami about quitting the bookstore for the second time--the first time was last summer. I reminded him of this conversation and asked where we were in the process of finding someone to take over my shift. He told me he hadn't given it serious thought, and that I need to talk to bookstore boss about it.

So I was upset, and I spent all day yesterday trying to process that three minute conversation and decide what to do next. Also, I watched a documentary called The Boys of Baraka loaned to me by my friend B--it was okay. It made me think about some things I don't normally think about: bad poverty, crime-ridden ghettos, boys.

Then this morning I went to Vedanta at 8 to meet with Vedanta friends to go to the Bay area to see Amma. The day exhausted me--lots of waiting, but it was all worth it to get that strong hug and feel her whispering a mantra in my ear. I was elated and dizzy and shaken, in a good way. I was standing outside when she arrived, and I saw her in the car--she looked just like in the pictures, smiling a great big smile.

Tomorrow we're going on a journey, like many people must be doing, the day before Thanksgiving. Erik wants to take the 5. I need to decide what my vote is. So many decisions lately, and things to worry about. It will be good to get out of town for a few days, but we always worry about Kitty.