my first three days

First day we walked through Las Vegas. I cried on The Strip. I was having problems with the excess. Also, I was having problems with gender. I was upset by the portrayal of naked women as commodities. It made me feel vulnerable / violated. So I cried and cried as we peacewalked. It was painful but okay. I think my reaction was sane, a sane reaction to an insane place. Have you been there? The lights, the sounds, everything larger than life, billboards that are like huge tvs.

Then at night a new friend helped me. She invited me to her bedroom at Nevada Desert Experience and I sat on her bed while we talked about my feelings, and then we did a grounding exercise. It felt good to breathe. Then she smudged me with sage, and I smudged her with sage (my first time doing that). I was grateful.

Oh, also I was crying that first day because I was in a lot of physical pain too. My shins were hurting and tight, pain with every step.

Second day my right leg stopped hurting, so I was in pain every-other step. Sorry I'm complaining a lot. I want to tell you what's beautiful.

First morning out in the desert, I was elated despite the pain. I told a new friend, "This is what I signed up for!" The desert is beautiful. Creosote, joshua trees, gorgeous mountains, and huge expanses of glorious open space.

Today was more of the same. New friends walked with me by the roadside. We talked about religious experience, radical mental health, Hanuman. I'm peace signing all the vehicles that pass, which is my blessing. Some drivers flip me off, most ignore or seem to ignore, and many wave, honk, or flash peace signs back.

I got sunburnt despite sunscreen and overly socialized and wasn't too functional at lunch, and people noticed, which was embarrassing. I was encouraged to drink Gatorade. It was orange.

I walked less today than yesterday. I estimate I only got about five miles today? I enjoyed singing Nanya Spriha and Sarvamangala to myself over and over again.