why I'm a vegetarian abridged

We stopped by Naan Stop for some Indian food.  The veggie rice bowl is $6.  Ming got tofu saag, while I got the channa.  I never ever order that.  But the worker was giving samples.  The garbanzo beans were impossibly soft and super delicious.  Cooked from dry vs out of a can, they're like two different foods.

"What's the dish on the end?" I asked.

"Veggie xxxx," the worker said.

"Veggie what?" I asked.

"Veggie curry," he said.  "We call it curry, but there's no curry in it."

Basically I felt it was a made up dish with no name.  No problem.  He dished me samples in very small plastic cups.  It was fun to try everything.

"Are you vegetarian?" he asked.

"Yes," I said.

"Why?" he asked, in a strange combative tone.

I paused with surprise.  "For the environment," I said.

"For the animals," he answered for me, backing down.  His "why?" wasn't a real question, more of a challenge.  He didn't really want to hear my reason, believing he already knew it.

He had a little girl he was trying to take care of while working.  He seemed intellectual, feisty, and maybe cranky.  Not sure about him.

In actually I think meat is kind of gross.  I don't wanna eat blood, fat, skin, or muscle, or encounter bone or any worse stuff I will not even mention to you.  If a mammal, that animal was carried and birthed by its mother, loved by her, probably nursed and licked, nudged, encouraged, cherished.  I don't think I have more of a right to live than a mammal.  I feel the same as them.  They can't talk, but they can do other cool things.

As for birds, I used to think they were pretty different from mammals.  But crows are smarter than some people.  I don't think people are valuable based on how smart they are.  But it seems twisted.  They have personalities, form alliances, hold grudges.  I don't want to kill birds.

Fish and shrimp, I don't relate to them, much.  But it seems unnecessary to eat them.  I don't want to see a dead fish and know it died for me.  I don't wanna kill anything.  Except mosquitoes.  Some bugs are about it.

And I feel like if I wouldn't do it myself, I wouldn't want to pass it off to anyone and make them do my dirty work for me.  An uncle used to work in a slaughterhouse.  He didn't like it, but he was trying to stick around for the retirement.  He told me some terrible tales I'll spare you.  I could never do that.  No way it's worth it.

We took the food to go.  Ming left some donated books in the little free library in front of the co-op.  We drove downtown to the public library.  We sat outside for a long time.  I enjoyed the eucalyptus trees. 

I ate some channa and rice.  It was too spicy, so Ming and I traded.  I ate almost all of his tofu and some of his saag, so delicious--soft, slippery, salty, tender, green, intense, warming, complex, satisfying.  And the channa was way hotter than the saag.  Ming liked it.

Then we were at the library--I was trying to email a friend, but I got distracted reading about an iceman mummy.  I needed to be distracted, so that's ok.

Then Ming went to get the minivan out of the parking structure, but it had a flat tire.  He seemed upset when he finally picked me up.  I think he was scared because a tow truck couldn't get into a parking structure.

Too many things are going wrong.  It makes me want to stay home.  Life is pretty damn risky.  But, I guess risk is unavoidable.  "A boat is safe in harbor, but that's not what boats are made for."

All this is an introduction to the picture.