inside outside

Last night all night I was thinking about the load we're taking down on Wednesday.  Tomorrow Ming gets the truck, and he's scared to drive it.  I'm scared on his behalf. 

I got a letter from one of my two prisoners penpals who's in solitary confinement up in Pelican Bay in Crescent City.  He is very nice and wants more zines.  He sent me his picture and explains in the letter that he's standing like that (with his hands behind his back) because he's in handcuffs.  It almost made me cry.

I penpal with some people who I have no idea what they look like and they have no idea what I look like.  But I'm considering sending photos to my two prisoner penpals because I know they'd like to see what I look like.

But I feel kind of contrary about it like why should it matter?  I can't decide.