dangerous compassions

I call you / from the comet's cradle

Tuesday, August 31, 2010

strange bag

On the train there was someone carrying a bag with pictures of handguns all over it.


We're home from our trips, Erik's backpacking trip and my trip to my parents' by bus and train. We're exhausted but happy and well. Guess what? One night it snowed on Erik. He slept without a tent. He woke up and there were flurries. And it had hailed. They had tons of adventure, and I think he's going to make his own blog to tell the tale. If and when that happens, I will direct you to it.

Monday, August 30, 2010

butterflies in my stomach

Saturday I saw my friend S who left for Burning Man yesterday. We ate Mexican food for dinner and really talked. I think it was our first time just the two of us since we were teenagers. It was a real treat. Then we stopped by his place to see the green RV and meet S's dad.

Yesterday I saw my friend A--he took me grocery shopping and to a new park. I stood by while he chose what steak to buy and was suprised when he didn't get any beer--he said he'd been drinking a lot since his girlfriend dumped him a month ago. At the park we walked around a track he said was half a mile, and I lost my breath, I guess because he's tall and walks faster than I do.

Soon I'm going to my old high school to see a good friend J who teaches English there. It will be lunch time. I will bring him an apple from See Canyon, a Burgundy. I'm nervous to sneak on campus because I'm not so young anymore. I don't think I'll blend in. I thought about bringing my bakcpack.

Then at noon my bestie will come see me. It's been a friend-filled weekend. She and I will go out to lunch and to the park.

Thursday, August 26, 2010

pancakes, Target, swing

Last night I made nutritional yeast pancakes. They were disgusting! It was some random recipe I found on the internet, three ingredients.

Then tonight I made vegan pumpkin pancakes. They were so good! However, they were super thick so it took forever to cook them. I should have added more water. Also, there was nothing in them to sweeten them, so I ate them with maple syrup, which is crazy sugar.

We have been to Target three times in the past two days, looking for backpacking stuff. Arg! And we were supposed to be boycotting them because they gave a ton of money to an anti-gay political candidate. Oops. We went there looking for a string you put on your glasses, around the back--Erik wanted one to be sure his glasses wouldn't come off while he looked over the edge of a cliff. Anyway, they didn't have any. And we went there looking for hiking socks yesterday before getting some at REI. And then we went there for a certain type of underwear--really, there is no K-Mart. Where are you supposed to buy underwear if you're not going to Target or Walmart? I guess we could have gone to Kohls.

Someone put a swing in one of the magnolia trees in the courtyard of our apartment complex. When I sit here at my computer desk I can see a kid swinging and the tree moving as if it were very windy.

Wednesday, August 25, 2010

finished shopping

Invested in two pairs of hiking socks for Erik today, one blueish and one greenish. It's good to finish shopping. Now we can wash laundry and be one step closer to finishing our preparations.

It's been hot--today's high was supposed to be 106. Hot moments in parking lots. Feels like summer in Sacramento. It's cooling off a lot this weekend, though.

We got Erik a new lens cap and little memory card for his camera. We went to Elliot's natural food store, which we hadn't visited in a long time (it's next door to the camera shop). We looked around at all the food, and I tried a peanutbutter pretzel. But I don't like pretzels. We looked at lip balm.

I got a nice letter from K who developed a new policy of two items on her to do list per day. I like that idea. Do two things, and do them well.

Tuesday, August 24, 2010

dazzled by socks

Well, we found long johns and warm vest at a thrift store today. They were inexpensive. All Erik needs now are hiking socks and lip balm.

We went to REI for hiking socks this morning. The choices overwhelmed us and we left without buying anything.

Monday, August 23, 2010

results of thrift store shopping

Yesterday we thrift store shopped. I found some jean shorts, a black teeshirt, a gray teeshirt, and some brown pants. They're simple. Erik found a gray windbreaker as well as a long sleeved off-white hiking shirt. He's wanted one for a while, and we lucked out. He also found a black winter cap (it gets below freezing at night in Yosemite this time of year, strangely) and a stylin' green hat. It looks like something Fidel Castro might wear.

Today we went out to lunch with S and A. It was unusual for me to be in a group of people, and I met S for the first time. Everyone was very nice. We talked about books, movies, work, fantastic news stories, A's new dog, Erik's backpacking plans.

Keeping my fingers crossed that someone sees the freecycle wanted ad I posted for a warm vest and long johns for Erik's trip and has those items to offer. I suspect a vest might be expensive.

Sunday, August 22, 2010

offensive signage, backpacking, Food Not Bombs

Today we saw some offensive signage on the way to Trader Joe's, a guy by himself on a street corner with fluorescent GOD HATES FAGS and TURN OR BURN. How do you even react to something like that? Would flipping him off just add fuel to the flame? What does he want? To hurt people? To cause discussion? He did cause discussion between me and Erik, discussion about how to react. After we bought our groceries, he was gone. Erik says the guy's so angry because he knows he's losing.

Erik's going backpacking! The friend he's backpacking with has given him a list of things to bring, and we need to find a few items, like a windbreaker. It's very exciting that this friend is willing to take him backpacking.

This morning we volunteered with Food Not Bombs. Mostly it consisted of chopping veggies, lots of tomatoes especially. We also shredded zucchini. It was fun.

Saturday, August 21, 2010


Today tree trimmers have cut down a tree I love, a mulberry tree that grew in front of our apartment complex. This tree shaded our car for six years. I think its brother might be doomed too. We'll see how many trees are down by day's end.

Jesus in a hat


Erik has a Rembrandt painting as his desktop, and it depicts Jesus in a hat. What the heck? And he has a shovel in one hand. So I googled "Jesus in a hat" and got eight hits. One is talking about a different painting depicting Jesus in a hat--in that painting, his upper body is naked and the shovel is in his left hand, but in Erik's Rembrandt, the shovel is in his right.

Anyway, I said "Jesus in a hat" would be a good curse, but we decided it doesn't roll off the tongue. However, my high school band director would curse "God bless America."

Friday, August 20, 2010

bobby pins

I think of bobby pins as really old fashioned. But I bought some today at the dollar store. I went to the dollar store to look for barrettes for holding wisps of my hair back while I cook for Food Not Bombs on Sunday, if that really happens. I bought some snap clips also.

The last time I remember using a bobby pin was when I played Annie Sullivan in the play The Miracle Worker when I was in the fifth grade. My mom used bobby pins to secure the bun in my hair. They were black.

So I had never used them as an adult, but when I was little they were around, everyday objects.

our exciting apartment complex

Last night the neighbor kids were up hitting things until about midnight, Erik tells me--I put in earplugs around 10:15. Then this morning there was a domestic disturbance starting around 7:20.

I've been making some delicious oatmeal with walnuts and flaxseed meal in it, with brown sugar and Earth Balance and cinnamon, made with soymilk. It's creamy and good.

Erik really likes the movie Donnie Darko. He wants to watch it again so wants to keep it out from the library even though it was due yesterday. (It can't be renewed because it's on hold.)

missing the moonlight underbridge bat-viewing canoe expedition

Yesterday morning Erik went hiking with S. Then before 10 our friend P called inviting us to a moonlight canoe expedition to see some bats under a bridge. I thought Erik might be home early because S hasn't hiked much and I thought he might want to turn back early. But that wasn't so--Erik was home about 40 minutes after P left for the preserve. So we missed it.

Thursday, August 19, 2010


A few days ago someone at our apartment complex got a motorcycle--or else someone new came to live at our apartment complex who has a motorcycle. Not sure which. At any rate, it's very loud, and the motorcyclist comes and goes a lot, waking us up--last night he came and went at least three times, which was strange. I'm usually good at tuning out vehicle noises, but the motorcycle has made me sensitive to them, so the little honks from people arming that car alarms are bothering me now. Last night Erik had insomnia, and I did too, to a lesser degree. Today he's hiking with S.

Wednesday, August 18, 2010

theme song

Our family has a new theme song, "Electric Feel" by MGMT. I can't figure out what the time signature is--I suspect it keeps changing?

edit to add: We watched the music video--Erik says it looks like a beer commercial.

more edit to add: Watching the video again, Erik says, "They're making fun of their coolness in a way that's cool. They're meta-cool."

lemon diamonds

When Erik and I were at San Francisco Botanical Garden a couple weeks ago, there was a plant called Kangaroo's Paw, and the other day I saw they were selling it at Trader Joe's.

Also at Trader Joe's they were selling Naked Ladies. I thought about buying some but didn't.

Today we went to a brilliant Music at Noon concert, a pianist who was obviously a genius and played us an hour of music by memory. I think I liked the Beethoven best.

This morning I saw my friend P. She was wearing a blanket like a shawl. She'd had a bad reaction to some medication.

This afternoon I took a long nap and dreamt of a friend I haven't seen in 20 years and dreamt Erik asked me to marry him and gave me lemon diamond earrings. I told him, "We're already married," and accepted them.

Tuesday, August 17, 2010

book club fail

Today I went to my first ever book club meeting. It was kind of like school but worse. It started with, "I hated it!" and, "Me too!" I wanted some intense discussion and some insight shed, something better than just thinking about Case Histories on my own, but it never really got going. I was too quiet to help much. Oh well.


Waiting for the San Francisco Zine Fest organizers to put up the workshop schedule. However, I was informed that my women's religious group is having a board meeting, so I guess I'm not going that day.

Monday, August 16, 2010


Today I saw my friend M who was visiting Sacramento to see me. We went to my favorite park and walked a little. We saw a squirrel collecting magnolia fruits. Then we went to Vallejo's for lunch. M really liked her mahi-mahi torta.

Today Erik went bowling with S. While he was gone I washed the dishes and worked on a letter to C in Oregon. Erik's headache went away--it was gone this morning.

Today I got out from the library a movie called Young @ Heart which was recommended to me by a stranger whose name I can't recall--I met her in the mail through sendsomething.net. It's a documentary, and I want to watch it tonight.

I got a plump bag of fresh basil at the farmers market on Sunday, and I'm going to make some pasta for dinner. Erik's peeling garlic.

Sunday, August 15, 2010

mung dal with tomatoes

Tonight for dinner I made mung dal but added tomatoes. It was my first time adding tomatoes. It's delicious, but I think I prefer it the other way because this way it tastes almost like red lentil dal and I prefer variation.

Erik's had a headache for 29 hours.

Case Histories

Finished my book. I think it depressed me. But it's over and I know who done it. Everything got tied up neatly at the end. I don't feel satisfied with the ending, but at least I'm finished.

Book club meeting on Tuesday! If I go, it will be my first book club meeting.


We have two neighbor kids. They seem happy and well-adjusted, a true rarity in our apartment complex. They like to shoot baskets. But a few weeks ago they got a martial arts lesson by some mysterious teenager. Ever since they've been really, really into hitting things. Also, they don't seem to have a bedtime. Last night they were hitting things until after 11:37, when I finally put in earplugs. I don't hate these kids--I kind of like them. But I don't like being kept up way past my bedtime. Bedtimes for all!

Saturday, August 14, 2010


Yesterday I didn't leave the apartment, not even to check the mail (Erik checked it). I was recovering from the SF trip and reading. I'm in the middle of Case Histories by Kate Atkinson. I don't think it's good for me, but it's utterly compelling, so I'm going to finish it.

But it's Second Saturday. We might look at some art, or maybe Erik is already--he's out with T, who got a haircut today and looks different. I got home from helping P with the bulletin, and those two were sitting on the apartment complex's front steps looking at photos on T's camera.

I've been eating slightly overripe mangoes. Drinking hibiscus tea. Messing around on the computer. And that is all.

Friday, August 13, 2010

SF trip

Yesterday I went to San Francisco with friends. We ate vegan foods that surpassed all expectations at Gracias Madre and then vegan ice cream at Maggie Mudd's. It was fun to look at stores in the Mission district, and I bought a few cute cards and looked at books. I met a new friend K who reminded me of someone I would have known for a long time. I was comfortable with her. We visited a beautifully painted place called The Women's Building. Its outside is covered with one of the most beautiful murals I have ever seen. It was fun and exhausting to ride BART and busses. We got very cold waiting for a bus and had a cuddle huddle. H took pictures. I was quiet but I hope not too quiet.

Wednesday, August 11, 2010

my personal zine fest

Reading Ken Chronicles 15 and will move on to 16, which came in the mail. Got Sage's Marked For Life 6--looking forward to that. I got a new Pamphleteer. My friend A sent me vegan cookzine Soy Not Oi! which I had heard of but never seen. Cryptstine Maria sent Sins of Machines 2 as well as Things Found in Library Books. Carrie McNinch sent You Don't Get There From Here 15. And this is just what's on the top layer of my desk material!!!!!!!


I baked a nectarine crisp using nectarines my mom bought me at Costco. It takes a while to peel them, but that's okay. It turned out great only the top is wet, not dry. I don't know why this is. I guess I didn't make enough topping. It's delicious anyway, though.

Tuesday, August 10, 2010

word bubbles rising

I don't know if you need to be logged in to see it, but I'm recently obsessed with this game.


Reed avocado

A few days ago I bought a Reed avocado in Santa Cruz at Staff of Life, one of my favorite grocery stores. I had never heard of Reed avocados. Mine is larger and rounder than a Hass or Bacon. Also, it's smoother than a Hass and stayed green when it was ripe. The sign at Staff of Life said it's lower in fat than Hass and wouldn't get stringy when ripe. So I decided to buy one--anyway, I just ate half of it, with salt, and it's very good. The texture is perfect.

compilation station

There's a new blog by Nicole Introvert for posting calls for submissions.


Monday, August 09, 2010

survived the drive home

We're home from a weekend spent at my parents' house. Some highlights include picking blueberries near Nojoqui falls, blueberry pancakes, and a nectarine-blueberry crisp my mom and I made. It was a fabulous weekend, but the drive home is terribly exhausting. Erik's unpacking the car. Kitty's relaxing on Erik's zabuton.

Thursday, August 05, 2010

overdid it, homes

I have seven letters to reply to, and I haven't checked the mail yet today. Luckily I like all of these people very much.

Wednesday, August 04, 2010

prop 8 overturned

Prop 8 was overturned today. I am very, very glad. This means a lot to me and my friends. Equal rights for all!


Tuesday, August 03, 2010

Golden Gate Park

Today we went to San Francisco--it was free day at our favorite museum, the de Young. We saw the textiles exhibit, which was fantastic. We looked at some other stuff too--lots of masks and spirit shields and statues--until my brain was full. Then we visited the San Francisco Botanical Garden and looked at some beautiful plants. There was a certain area with different types of fuchsias. I called it fuchsia mania. I really like them. And there was a vine with strange flowers that we called alien flowers--they were being visited by bumble bees.

Then we walked into the city a few blocks looking for an Indian-Pakistani place where we might get samosas for a treat. We didn't find the one we were looking for, but we did find vegan ice cream. I had a flavor called Charlie Brown's Nightmare, and it was good.

Sunday, August 01, 2010


I really love this chrysanthemum print.


veggie soup

Today I made some veggie soup out of our cookbook of vegetarian food from the Middle East and North Africa. It has allspice in it. Turns out it tastes just like regular veggie soup. I substituted fresh parsley for fresh cilantro because I don't like cilantro. But still I was surprised when it tasted so commonplace.

"How's the soup?" Erik just asked. He hasn't tasted it--he was doing yoga.

"Boring," I said.

"I bet I'll like it," he said. He likes almost everything.

edit to add: He loves it!


That red bowl I got yesterday at the thrift store for 67 cents is a Waechtersbach--I looked up the company, and it's an old German company, but the bowl says Spain on the bottom. I looked at all the red dishes being made, and the design of my bowl is no longer being made. I love its shape, so I feel lucky.